When Being Passive Aggressive is the Best Option

No! Madam, we cannot!

Honesty is the best policy... Until it isn't

🥷🏻🥷🏻

Honesty is the best policy... Until it isn't 🥷🏻🥷🏻

In my life, I've been passive-aggressive. I've avoided fights, let people get away with murder, and left people behind enough to want to apologize to the people I hurt. I hurt these people by not being there when they needed me. Allegedly. Some people wanted me to be there when they didn't need me and in my Enneagram 9 type, I stuck around despite not wanting to be there.

I love the Enneagram system more than the zodiac for figuring people out, but that's for another conversation. THIS conversation is about when being passive-aggressive is the best option. You may want to save the world, but a lot of people in your space don't feel the same. So here are three situations where you avoid telling the truth and do something passive-aggressive to get your point across.

Thing #1: When Asked to Leave The Toilet Seat Down

If you've ever shared a bathroom with women you've been in this situation before. You go to the bathroom, you don't want to touch the toilet and relieve yourself without putting the toilet seat back down. Your female partner or roommate can't stand this! She will directly ask you to put the toilet seat down. Chances are, you forget and have the same fight repeatedly.

How can you break this chain of battles? You, as a man think this fight is ridiculous. She, as a woman, thinks you are ridiculous and that she asked you to do one thing, that you won't do. This is annoying for everyone. Nobody wants to touch the toilet when they go, and women take a downed toilet seat as a personal value. Men need to learn to put the toilet seat down and save their relationships.

THE PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PART

Put both toilet seats down!

I put both toilet seats down. The one you sit on, and the one that blocks you from sitting down. I started doing this because I was mad at having the toilet seat argument. I thought, if I had to touch the toilet, she had to touch the toilet too. Now that we both had to touch and lift lids, I haven't heard a single complaint.

Thing #2: The Bathroom Wet Wipes

I need this freshness! Close my wipes or don’t use my wipes.

If you treat your back door like the sacred place it is, and cannot install a bidet (I tried once and broke a toilet) , you'll have to purchase some wet wipes to stay as smooth and clean as possible. Hopefully, everybody has them. If you don't, your butt is probably super gross.

While keeping a clean back nozzle might be important to you, everyone you share a bathroom with might not feel the same way. What's worse than that though, is walking into the bathroom and seeing they are using the wet wipes container you've made available for everyone open with a wet wipe sticking out. You feel rage as you take this now dry ass wet wipe out of the box and close the thing yourself. You can't afford a Japanese toilet, so everyone involved needs to pay.

THE PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PART

If you want to get back at these people, all you have to do is turn the whole wet wipe package over. Make the wipes a little hard to get out. If they want to feel as clean as you do they'll have to pick the package up and turn it over themselves to use them. This will help them recognize that they keep leaving the wet wipes open, and will save you from having to tell people how to shit all the time.

Thing #3: When People Talk Mess About You

I’ll show them… Hand me that 4th item.

Is there anybody in your life who annoys the shit out of you? A brother, a cousin, a roommate, someone on the internet? Whoever they are they likely know that they are annoying to you. People like this find some sick happiness in getting on your nerves. These types might call you names you hate, demand hugs when you don't want to give them, or make weird noises when they're in earshot. Whatever they do makes you want to lash out at them! If you do that, they'll know they're hurting you and they will l keep on doing it until the day one of you dies.

THE PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PART

Agree. That's all you have to do. It'll be hard. You will be mad, but these types love to annoy you. Don't allow them the pleasure of seeing you upset.

If they call you something you hate being called, just agree that's what you are.

If they demand a hug, give them a very long deep hug until you can feel their discomfort.

If they make random noises you can't stand, turn up your TV until you can't hear them.

If they listen to podcasts, turn on your own podcast that is just as loud as theirs is.

Prove your point by agreement and watch their behavior change. This won't be easy for you. It's not easy for anyone in your position, but if you can't be direct use the passive-aggressive method to get these people off your case. Let them say or act in whatever way they want. Keep your composure when they get on your nerves. If you can pretend they, they will knock it off.

Thank You Passive-Aggressiveness

This isn’t the only way to get by in life, but it’s one of my favorites. Sometimes you have to be direct and piss people off at the jump. Sometimes you have to go over the head of a boss to get the things you need. There may not be many reasons to take the most passive-aggressive approach, but these are some of my favorites.